Recently, I've been feeling like my life is out of my control. Sounds a bit over-dramatic perhaps, and I guess it probably is. I think I need to gain some perspective so I thought I'd write a few words to try to lift the fog...

It's really only to do with work I suppose, but as that's a rather large chunk of my time, it does affect other areas of my life. Not in the least because it funds my life.

I was offered a new job within my company recently. It wasn't really something I would get excited about but it was offered to me at VERY favourable terms... so I accepted the job. About a week later, those VERY favourable terms were withdrawn (I think because the company I work for is @#~*&^). So I withdrew my acceptance. That caused a bit of an issue it seems.

Several people from management came to see me, to 'talk off the record, the decision was entirely up to me'. I stuck to my guns, especially as no one was trying to anything to negotiate the terms at all. Eventually, the Director of a large part of my business unit came to see. Reckoned he came to talk to me as a friend. I hardly know the guy so that was a rather large stretch really. So it was clear the pressure was on. It was my decision as long as I decided to take the job...
So I did, I really didn't have much of a choice, there would've been repercussions. I suppose I could've left the company, but like I said, the job funds my life... What do you do?

Yesterday, it was announced that we've won the contract that I will now be working on. Good news I guess, but it brings a lot of change with it. I have to move to a different office, but they haven't finalised a new office for this work yet.
I have to handover my current job, but there isn't a replacement yet.
There isn't currently enough information to know anything for sure. There are way too many lines of communication, all saying slightly different things, and plenty of rumours about. It's difficult to figure it all out.
People are asking me questions, and asking me to make decisions but I don't have all the information to do so. And I just feel like they're pressuring me into things that I don't like or want to do etc.
I feel all this work stuff is out of my control. And that's not very nice.

So I guess I'll have to take back that control somehow... I don't like that they can exercise so much pressure over me, all for the sake of a career, as if there's nothing more important. Rubbish!

Right, rant over... for now at least. Gonna make a phone call and stand up for myself.